My 26th Birthday Dinner – Thai Moose Stir Fry


I turned 26 today. I relocated some lawn gnomes. Ate some crepes. I stayed up way too fricking late last night and was woken up way too fricking early by my parents calling to wish me a happy birthday. Which was awesome. I would have been heartbroken if my dad had let me sleep in. I also had to do my laundry today because I was out of undies and I’d worn everything that I like to wear in my wardrobe at least five times past the normal amount of times you’re allowed to wear something before it’s considered dirty. Plus Sunday’s are laundry days for me. They’re also the days where I cook and clean because I live alone and therefore have to pretend like I’m an adult sometimes.

So because it’s my birthday, I hit up the grocery store while I was doing my laundry and bought my weekly groceries, grabbed a can of baby corn and came home to make myself some Thai Moose Stir Fry. A while back I came across this recipe and thought it looked pretty darn great and I wanted to try it. It was Thai Chicken and Vegetable Stir Fry. I linked it twice just so you know how great I thought this recipe looked to me so that you can go look at it and agree with me. Well after I read the recipe over and over again, I made my bastardized version of it.

My first attempt at Thai Chicken Veggy Stir Fry.

My first attempt at Thai Chicken Veggy Stir Fry.

I made sure that I had all of this stuff:
(If I didn’t have it, I bought it)

  • Rice
  • Ground up chicken
  • Carrots
  • Green peppers
  • Soy Sauce
  • Teriyaki Sauce
  • Olive oil
  • A garlic bulb thing (Of which I used 3 of the section thingys)
  • Onion
  • Lime

This is what I did as I tried to follow the directions to the original recipe:

  1. I grabbed one of my non-stick pots and threw it on the stove and preheated it. While it got hot, I minced 3 of those garlic section thingys. Once the pot was hot, I splashed (Splashed because I don’t like to measure stuff because I don’t own measuring stuff) in a little bit of olive oil and then threw the garlic in there and moved the garlic around until my entire kitchen stunk of cooked garlic.
  2. Once my kitchen stunk of garlic, I tossed in the ground chicken and cooked the heck out of it because I’m terrified of under cooking chicken. In the process of grinding it up, a piece of greasy ground chicken escaped into the element burst into flames. Small flames, but enough flame to jump into the pot and cause a decent sized fire that I smothered. Don’t worry, it helped the browning process.
  3. After the fire was out and the chicken was working on being brown, I chopped up my carrot, green pepper, and onion. I also started the rice making process. Because I can make rice in a pot.
  4. Once the chicken was brown I tossed the veggies into the pot and let them cook a little bit.
  5. While the veggies were cooking a little bit, I squeezed an entire lime over them, stirred them up to get them mixed with the ground chicken and then I splashed that with some soy and teriyaki sauce.
  6. Once everything was cooked to my satisfaction I put a scoop of rice into a bowl and topped it with my chicken/veggie mixture.
  7. Then because I hadn’t bastardized the recipe enough, I put ketchup on it, mixed it all together and ate it happily.
I totally robbed a garden to get all of this.

I totally robbed a garden to get all of this.

Since that first time, I’ve improved upon this recipe of my own. I add sprouts. Tonight because it was my birthday, I also added a whole can of baby corn. I also had red AND green peppers. My sister likes peppers, so for some reason I decided to add a lot of red and green peppers. I think I miss her or something like that. Plus there were carrots and onions like the first time.

Oh, and this time because I have a freezer full of moose meat, including moose mince, I used ground up moose meat. Hencely I made my version of Thai Moose Stir Fry. I don’t think that it was very Thai, but I need to call it something and since I based this off of a recipe called Thai Chicken and Vegetable Stir Fry, I’m calling what I made for my 26th birthday dinner Thai Moose Stir Fry.

I drank it with pink lemonade that I put frozen raspberries in for funsies.

I also still stirred it all together with ketchup in the end. Not that this doesn’t Thai Moose doesn’t taste good without ketchup because it’s pretty darn good on it’s own, but I just like to add ketchup to my food. It makes it better.



Reasons Why I Shouldn’t Cook Unsupervised…


This is the cartoon version of me on one of my not so good nights of cooking unsupervised. Seriously, I should be supervised when in the kitchen.

So over the last year or so, I’ve been teaching myself how to cook. There have been some fricking awesome successes, while at the same time there have been some pretty horrible fails. For the most part, I never really know what happens, but sometimes stuff just turns out great. Or it turns out bad. Or sometimes it catches on fire.

I have a wonderful knack for setting pancakes on fire as I’ve done this twice within the last two months and it has led me to making microwave french toast. I can handle microwave french toast. You butter a bowl, toss in some cubed bread, pour an egg, milk, and cinnamon mixture over it, and then you microwave it until the egg is cooked. It takes me like 5 minuets to make. And for the last 30 seconds that I’m nuking my french toast, I stick a little mixing bowl of like four table spoons of peanut butter in there too so I can drizzle peanut butter all over it.

I’ve also set pizza on fire numerous times.

I feel like I need to start a cook book where I keep track of the stuff that turned out well and the stuff that was not so good and the stuff that caught on fire.

…Sadly that list of things that I’ve set on fire grows as I try to experiment with food and teach myself to cook.

Look, mom!


Growing up on a rural reserve meant a few things happened here that probably wouldn’t happen in the city. These things included:

  • Getting a pellet from a pellet gun in my dinner one night because my younger sister was shooting birds off a deer we had hanging in the back yard and she missed once
  • Kittens getting stolen by birds of prey
  • Running water down a hill to create a mud slide to play in
  • The power being out for a period longer than a few hours

li-620-power-outage-cp02887Unfortunately when the power goes out during the night and remains out well into the next day while you and your sister are playing in a slow pitch tournament, you get a little stinky. And sweaty. And dirty and just a little bit all around gross from running around in the dirt while covered in a fine layer of sweat. Mostly though…I worried about the stink. I was fine with being a dirty mess, but at some point my deodorant decided that it was working too hard and quit on me. Seriously, people, even though I am a stickler for putting on deodorant 2-3 times a day and more when I’m playing sports, my smell simply overpowered all the awesomeness that the commercials claim their deodorant to have and spanked my Old Spice Sport into submission.

Then after the abuse it stopped working and I was left smelling like a bag of old gym shoes and musky towels. Sadly I am not one of those girls who never sweats. I am one of those girls who pours rivers of sweat and that sweat never smells good.

With no way of getting clean because the power was off, my sister and I were left to feel dirty and I was left with cartoon stink lines emanating off my body.

Then we remembered that I had my driver’s license and could drive to a nearby lake to get clean!

With that thought, we packed up clean clothes, towels, shampoo, soap and other bathing in a lake paraphernalia, hopped into my 92 Saturn SCI and drove to the lake to get clean.  When we got to the lake we found that there was a family there enjoying the hot weather and sun so Tiff and I waded over to a broken old dock that had previously been a really good dock that my dad and I had made a few years before that. Now, let me tell you! Nothing feels better than rubbing the stink off of your body after you’ve had to sit and literally smell your own brand of stale body odour and dried sweat for the last few hours. The moment I was fully under water and came up for air was one of pure bliss. I felt most of the smell wash away and I was refreshed.

Mostly I was just happy for my first breath of clean air in a number of hours.

Then as I washed my hair and body I just felt better and better while totally and deliberately ignoring the fact that I was washing my dirt, grime and smell down the creek that fed out of the lake. I scrubbed and scrubbed and scrubbed until I felt clean while my sister did the same. Never mind that there was a family with two young children who got to see us bathe…which was a weird experience. I’d never really had anyone watch me clean myself so thoroughly before.

After we were done getting the 7 Layers of Heaven for a dirt worm off of us, Tiff and I hopped up onto the dock to air dry a little bit and that’s when we finally paid attention to family that was sharing that area of the lake with us. Typical family with a mom, a dad, an older child, and a very excited younger child. The type of younger child who shamelessly shouts every single word as we’d been hearing during our bathing process. The type of younger child that would get very excited and shout in glee and proclaim to his mother…


I nearly peed myself laughing. I personally thought it was cute because my sister and I are First Nations (Native American except we’re Canadian) and are definitely western. So what he shouted was accurate.

Also: the mom looked mortified and I couldn’t help but chuckle at her trying to shush her son’s excitement over seeing me and my sister stand around on our broken down old dock. I was ok with that. We were fabulous and we were clean.