The life skill I want to use…


Oh, I’m sorry? You need help getting ripped off? YEAH! I CAN DO THAT!

This weekend was busy and full of an incredible amount of laughter. At a couple of points I laughed so hard that I either choked on my spit or I started choking on my water that I was in the process of swallowing. I mean, yeah lots of of other stuff happened that was pretty cool too, but mostly I just laughed my fucking ass off. By the end of the night my face cheeks hurt and so did my tummy from laughing. Oh my throat was totally sore too from choking on stuff while I laughed.

But let’s face it, y’all…the highlight of my weekend wasn’t the fact that I laughed. Don’t get me wrong, laughing that much was awesome, but it was what I learned that really made everything extra special. You see, folks, learning for me is fun and it is especially fun when I learn something that is so incredibly useless to know, but someday it might come in handy.

Like ripping a persons ears off.

I don’t even remember where the idea came from, but next thing you know I’m asking about ripping someone’s ears off and…

“Oh, that’s easy. You just do it at a 45 degree angle.” I’m paraphrasing what the guy said, because I don’t remember the exchange word for word, but the gist was this: Tearing people’s ears off is easy. Then he completed it with a demonstration by moving his arm at a 45 degree angle like he was ripping someone’s ears off. Then I mimicked it and stored all of that information away for later.

Because you totally never know when you might need to rip someone’s ear or ears clean off their head…but now if the need ever arises, you can bet your bottom dollar that I’ll at least know how to do it in theory. I mean…I don’t image people will let me practice on them or anything. However, it’s still a valuable life skill and one that I want to use, but will probably never get a chance to.

What’s the most pointless thing you’ve ever learned but still want to apply in your every day life?

Oh and also: Hands down, this was probably the best advice I’ve ever gotten from a stranger.


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